Beating the Holiday Blues
RCBM's Melissa Oleshansky, PhD ( "Dr. O") shares thoughts and tips from Tara Brach: The holidays can bring up a lot of different emotions. While some people may feel much joy during this time, others may feel down or lonely. Acknowledge how you feel. Moods and feelings do not control you; rather, they are cues to what is happening to you. Leaning into the feeling can provide messages on how to nurture yourself to control moods and emotions to be the person you desire. You can pause, reflect, and choose who you want to be. One way to do this is through an applied meditation technique called RAIN, developed by Tara Brach, an American Buddhist meditation teacher, psychologist, and author.
RAIN stands for:
R- Recognize what is going on inside your body: notice if you are feeling a sense of sadness, anxiety, etc. Where in the body are you experiencing this?
A- Allow the feeling to be there; do not try to fight what is going on inside of you.
I – Investigate the feeling; pay attention to how it is living in your body. Ask yourself what you need at this time to help cope.
N – Nurture: offer yourself some kindness and compassion. Trust your goodness.
RAIN Application for seasonal moods:
Come into stillness. Your gaze can relax and look downward. Take a nice deep breath through the nose and slow breath out of the mouth to let go of negative thoughts, emotions, or physical agitation. Let the breath be slow and relaxed. Soften the hands. Open the chest by broadening the shoulders. Soften the belly. Scan the body. Scan your life and assess a situation that feels difficult. Maybe it is the winter season. This is a period where you wish you had more access to be who you want to be. Now, imagine you are watching yourself in a movie right now and freeze the frame in a part of the story where you would like to switch how you are acting. Investigate how you act and notice how your body feels at that moment. Put a hand on the body part where you feel that sense of vulnerability. You may want to feel your face and how you express the emotion. It takes courage to do this. Then ask yourself, what do you need to feel more at ease and relaxed at that moment? You may find that you will breathe deeper. You can feel tenderness and nurture from your hand to your heart. Trust your goodness and offer a message to yourself that you are okay. If you cannot give yourself a kind message, imagine someone else that you know or a figure of a person that is meaningful to you and that shared compassion and kindness with you. This will help shift your perception of yourself from what was to feeling more heartfelt and aligned with your true intentions.
You can find more meditations like RAIN, courses, and workshops by exploring Tara Brach’s website at Tarabrach.com.
